Last night was.. hard.
The overwhelming sense of vulnerability crowded at my thoughts and emotions past midnight.
I could feel the disappointment and loss by the people I loved and looked up to.
As if they had simply lost someone they really cherished closely to their hearts.
Like the nations little sister, an innocent girl who they had to say goodbye too soon. And part ways.
And I felt scared. I felt like I had not lived up to their expectations. I felt like I wasn't strong enough.
Last night was.. a blessing.
The past few days have taught me a lot.
About friendships.
Its never easy saying goodbye to the people you love.
I think thats why I always say see you soon.
Because in my heart I know. I will.
In the memories that we created. And the moments we shared.
It'll be with me always. I won't ever forget.
Because you mattered to me.
You let me be there for you when you didn't need anyone to care.
You let me into your life when you had all the people you needed.
You made me feel loved. You made me strong. And you made me into me.
I couldn't help but cry. I know we'll be ok. Even if it is hard right now.
No matter how difficult it is right now, you just want to be there for them.
Its no longer about yourself anymore. Because you realise, loving someone is far more greater and beautiful than feeling loved yourself.
But love is made up of actions. Not words. Its like a blinded devotion.
So I will choose to love you. Not because you want me to.
But because I want to, even if you cant back.
Love you with friendship, laughter, tears of joy, encouragements, affirmation, and care.
Thank you for everything. We went through so much together. I couldn'tve done it without you.
Grateful to have played a small part in their lives, even if it made them feel comforted and smile for a bit.
Last night was.. a lesson.
Here is my advice to you:
You only have one life to live, and thats it.
We can either panic and live in fear of uncertainty.
Or we can live boldly knowing that we're in God's hands, and stick to our commitments and values without fearing what others may think of us.
I honestly don't know what the future holds.
And I can see the world is changing before us.
All I know is that I don't want to go back.
Not backwards. But forwards.
Never in my dreams would I have thought to share my story public to thousands of people.
But if it meant having a voice.
I hope this encourages everyone to keep fighting, and keep loving life, just as it has been given to us.
