I'm not sure how to start this..
There has been times where I've broken down
and was not able to come up again
It's been hard.. lately. I don't know why or how I became at a state like this
Emotional? Over thinking too much?
The feeling of being loved or appreciated doesn't define with me at this moment, as if my existence is a hindrance to people's lives where I'm only summoned when they need of my assistance
Like I'm an object. Just justified to people's commands with no human needs
I don't know what to do right now
Don't get me wrong. I've very much figured out my life by this point, trying to live it to the fullest and grow as an individual exceeding over my limits and reaching for my goals and aspirations for the future
I feel as though I've lost a lot of people in my life because of my stupid 'mistakes"
Wanting things for the better. And it was for the better. It wasn't safe
Because of my naiive personality and limited knowledge of the circumstance, I suffered through it. Thinking it would get better, one day
It never did
I guess I just want some sort of comment. recognition. acknowledgement that I am human and I have flaws
I'm not ashamed of my past. I have guilt over it, yes but it's what made me who I am to this day
I will never forget it. But I will forgive.. and it will just be another memory to me
No emotions attached. No feelings revealed
Just another piece of experience at the back of my brain
So.. I'm asking myself
Where to from here
Sharna
Monday, 25th May 2015 - 1:45 a.m
